I love this topic. It’s so fascinating to learn what others think on it, read research and share my own experience related to it.
What’s your thoughts on this? So often I hear responses like “I can’t help it, it’s my nature” or “it’s just who I am, it’s not my fault”. Listen here bubba, often times that’s just an excuse for a poor behavior or a poor choice.
Let’s examine this for a minute. Did you know, I’m adopted. Yes, I was adopted as a baby, hence this is so fascinating to me. As an adult I found my biological family, with the help of my parents. Amazing experience for another blog post.
In any event, let me digress a moment to also include in this mini biopic that I was a huge pain in the butt teenager. When my mom used to ask me where she went wrong in her frustration trying to deal with me, I teased her and told her “Mom, it’s not you, it’s ME – it’s in my blood”. Little did I know just how close I was to the truth.
Back to finding my biological family. First, they are awesome, loving welcoming and incredibly diverse. I couldn’t be luckier to be honest. Within the first few phone calls we had already learned just how alike we all really were. It was actually uncanny. My one sister and I had had almost identical misadventures as teenagers! Finally, when I was able to visit them, my ex-husband cam along. He was quite honestly weired out by the whole thing. He later said to me that he couldn’t believe how I fit right in, like I never left (I was 25 years old at the time). He was astounded at the similarities in our mannerisms, sense of humor, habits and all kind of things.
As time went on what I did realize is my traditions, my daily habits, my religious practices, and so many things were often different than my biological family’s.
What? Yes, we were very different as well. We were as different as we were alike. This was the beginning of my fascination with this topic, when I actually saw it at work in my own world. I could go on for ages about it.
In the end, my point to this mini biopic post is that we are all biologically who we are AND we are also a result of nurture, environment and what we’ve been taught along the way. What does that mean to you? It means, yes you are “who you are” to an extent – and you have every ability to grow, learn and change into who you want to be, who you choose to be. Your basic self, your sense of humor, your laugh, your taste will always be you. You can’t change your “essence”. What you CAN change is your daily habits, your learning path, your personal and professional growth and much much more! So, don’t sit on your laurels and use the excuse “I am who I am”. Just don’t, it’s been proven wrong not just by me but by countless research.
Grow, be whoever you want to be!!!